BOOK EXCERPT
Fear Can Be a Source of Strength
When I started doing more dangerous investigations, like some of the undercover assignments I was given and certain types of surveillance, it was what my own father taught me about street smarts and communicating with people that helped me out of more jams than any of the limited training I went through in preparation for those assignments. At the end of the day, never forget that while being tough is noteworthy, wisdom trumps tough every time. We must never allow our ignorance to control our wisdom. Darwin’s theory of survival of the fittest may have had its time. In the twenty-first century, the watch phrase will be; survival of the wisest.
An experienced investigator understands that fear is decidedly much a part of the process. There are some who will not care for me using this word. They would prefer words like “cautious” or “guarded.” If my safety were in jeopardy, I would much prefer that we speak in unambiguous terms. There is nothing wrong with being afraid. In my opinion, fear keeps us alert. I am not talking about being in a state of terror, where an individual does not react sensibly. I am talking about a manageable and healthy level of apprehension. When a bad guy puts a gun to your head and says, “Get on your knees,” it is time for all tough guys to put the macho man on the shelf. If you are not in control, then you should do as you are told.
Never fool yourself into believing that a backup team can be transported to save the day at a moment’s notice. There is no backup that can respond faster than the bad guy holding a gun can pull the trigger, or cause some level of harm to you, your partner, or an innocent bystander. Buying time is the key to survival. Toughness will not do that; wisdom will. So, when the bad guy says, “Get on your knees,” I suggest that getting on your knees should be the chosen course of action for the moment. Now, when the backup team comes through the door, feel free to pick up macho man again.
When you lose the edge that fear gives you, you can also become careless and lose your life. Now, I perfectly understand that some might not agree with me on this point, but I can say with certainty that it has worked for me. The proof is that I successfully completed thousands of dangerous assignments and I am here to tell the story. Not because they all went so smoothly, but because I knew when to put the macho man on the shelf. I know for a fact that there are some pretty tough, fearless guys in the graveyard, with loved ones wishing that just for a moment, they would have been honest with themselves and substituted wisdom for macho.
Truth is the key to success. I have always shared with my fellow investigators that if they have any level of fear, they have an obligation to share that concern with a partner. That same obligation applies to me. Partners need to know each other’s state of mind so that an appropriate response will be forthcoming if things go wrong or the team’s safety is being challenged. The worst thing that can happen is for an investigator to discover after the hostility starts that a partner is too afraid to fight. Do not take partners lightly. Your partner is your lifeline. It might not seem like it, but there will come a time when you will find out if you have a partner, an associate, or an albatross around your neck.
I recall being on surveillance in the Bronx, New York, watching a gambling operation that was illegally set up in a government-owned building next door to a check-cashing store. My partner and I observed a woman coming out of the check-cashing store and a young man running up to her and snatched her pocketbook. We both looked at one another as the woman screamed for help, and we said at the same time, “Let’s get him.”
At that time, we both were young and relatively new at doing investigations. Needless to say, being proud members of an elite corruption-fighting organization gave us a sense of invincibility that came with the innocence of youth and inexperience. There was not much thought given to the danger that might come along with giving chase to this individual or the impact that our actions might have on our assignment. We jumped out of our vehicle and started chasing this person, while giving unheeded commands for him to stop. At the same time, the woman was screaming that he had stolen her purse. This alerted other people in the community to what had happened, and they too joined the pursuit.
I remember at one point looking back and seeing a number of people who had joined in the chase. This actually gave me a little confidence about our course of action. I do not know why; I guess I figured we could not all be wrong. Oh, the innocence of youth.
After we chased the subject for several blocks, he ran into a building and began running up the stairs. My partner and I followed him up the stairs. Upon reaching the top of the stairs, I looked back to check on our fellow pursuers, only to find out that they had dropped out and were no longer a part of the pursuit. I guess going from the God-given light of the streets to the uncertainty of the dimly lit, dank halls of a man-made structure gave them pause. Maybe my partner and I should have had a similar thought process, but let’s not forget that being invincible does not require applying logic to a situation.
My partner and I chased this individual to the roof of the building, where I think we both assumed he would have no place to go and give up. I know that this was what I was thinking. I never asked my partner what he was thinking at the time; so much for communication. Much to our surprise, upon reaching the roof, in an effort to continue to elude us, he began jumping from rooftop to rooftop. It was clear that he felt that we would not pursue. Again, being invincible, we followed without giving much thought to our actions at the time. I do not recall how many rooftops we jumped that day. However, we finally caught up with the subject comfortably hiding behind a wall, counting what he believed at that point was his ill-gotten gain.
We announced to the subject that we were taking him into custody and that he had to turn over the pocketbook and funds. Now at this time, my agency had not yet obtained arrest authority for its investigative staff. We approached the individual, and I handcuffed him. Now I know the thought running through your minds right now is, If you had no arrest authority, what were you doing with handcuffs? Well, again, this was early in my career, and I had not resigned from my employment as a store detective. I remained working there part-time, and I was going to that job after completing the surveillance. This being the case, I had the handcuffs with me that I used at that job.
I cuffed the subject and took custody of the pocketbook and money, and then radioed back to the office what had happened. They requested to know where we were so that they could send the police. It was then that we realized that we did not know exactly where we were. We knew that we had run several blocks and jumped rooftops of several buildings, but we had no idea where we had ended up.
At that point, we just walked the subject back to the location where he robbed the woman. The police and our fair-weather partners who had dropped out of the pursuit were there. The subject and the pocketbook were turned over to one of the officers, and we prepared to slip quietly away, like the Lone Ranger and Tonto (of course, I was the Lone Ranger). It was then that I realized that I did not have the key for the handcuffs. What can I tell you? Being invincible does not always make you prepared; that is the job of the Boy Scouts.
I share this long, somewhat humorous story to point out that there will come a time when you and your partner will have to demonstrate if you have each other’s backs. When we started that chase, it was my partner and I, along with several upstanding citizens, giving chase to the bad guy. When push came to shove, it was my partner and I standing shoulder to shoulder on an unknown rooftop, ready to face whatever came our way. Now, more than twenty-five years later, not as invincible, a few pounds heavier, a step or two slower, and blessed with a measure more of wisdom, I might handle a similar situation differently, but I would hope that I had the same partner.
When I started doing more dangerous investigations, like some of the undercover assignments I was given and certain types of surveillance, it was what my own father taught me about street smarts and communicating with people that helped me out of more jams than any of the limited training I went through in preparation for those assignments. At the end of the day, never forget that while being tough is noteworthy, wisdom trumps tough every time. We must never allow our ignorance to control our wisdom. Darwin’s theory of survival of the fittest may have had its time. In the twenty-first century, the watch phrase will be; survival of the wisest.
An experienced investigator understands that fear is decidedly much a part of the process. There are some who will not care for me using this word. They would prefer words like “cautious” or “guarded.” If my safety were in jeopardy, I would much prefer that we speak in unambiguous terms. There is nothing wrong with being afraid. In my opinion, fear keeps us alert. I am not talking about being in a state of terror, where an individual does not react sensibly. I am talking about a manageable and healthy level of apprehension. When a bad guy puts a gun to your head and says, “Get on your knees,” it is time for all tough guys to put the macho man on the shelf. If you are not in control, then you should do as you are told.
Never fool yourself into believing that a backup team can be transported to save the day at a moment’s notice. There is no backup that can respond faster than the bad guy holding a gun can pull the trigger, or cause some level of harm to you, your partner, or an innocent bystander. Buying time is the key to survival. Toughness will not do that; wisdom will. So, when the bad guy says, “Get on your knees,” I suggest that getting on your knees should be the chosen course of action for the moment. Now, when the backup team comes through the door, feel free to pick up macho man again.
When you lose the edge that fear gives you, you can also become careless and lose your life. Now, I perfectly understand that some might not agree with me on this point, but I can say with certainty that it has worked for me. The proof is that I successfully completed thousands of dangerous assignments and I am here to tell the story. Not because they all went so smoothly, but because I knew when to put the macho man on the shelf. I know for a fact that there are some pretty tough, fearless guys in the graveyard, with loved ones wishing that just for a moment, they would have been honest with themselves and substituted wisdom for macho.
Truth is the key to success. I have always shared with my fellow investigators that if they have any level of fear, they have an obligation to share that concern with a partner. That same obligation applies to me. Partners need to know each other’s state of mind so that an appropriate response will be forthcoming if things go wrong or the team’s safety is being challenged. The worst thing that can happen is for an investigator to discover after the hostility starts that a partner is too afraid to fight. Do not take partners lightly. Your partner is your lifeline. It might not seem like it, but there will come a time when you will find out if you have a partner, an associate, or an albatross around your neck.
I recall being on surveillance in the Bronx, New York, watching a gambling operation that was illegally set up in a government-owned building next door to a check-cashing store. My partner and I observed a woman coming out of the check-cashing store and a young man running up to her and snatched her pocketbook. We both looked at one another as the woman screamed for help, and we said at the same time, “Let’s get him.”
At that time, we both were young and relatively new at doing investigations. Needless to say, being proud members of an elite corruption-fighting organization gave us a sense of invincibility that came with the innocence of youth and inexperience. There was not much thought given to the danger that might come along with giving chase to this individual or the impact that our actions might have on our assignment. We jumped out of our vehicle and started chasing this person, while giving unheeded commands for him to stop. At the same time, the woman was screaming that he had stolen her purse. This alerted other people in the community to what had happened, and they too joined the pursuit.
I remember at one point looking back and seeing a number of people who had joined in the chase. This actually gave me a little confidence about our course of action. I do not know why; I guess I figured we could not all be wrong. Oh, the innocence of youth.
After we chased the subject for several blocks, he ran into a building and began running up the stairs. My partner and I followed him up the stairs. Upon reaching the top of the stairs, I looked back to check on our fellow pursuers, only to find out that they had dropped out and were no longer a part of the pursuit. I guess going from the God-given light of the streets to the uncertainty of the dimly lit, dank halls of a man-made structure gave them pause. Maybe my partner and I should have had a similar thought process, but let’s not forget that being invincible does not require applying logic to a situation.
My partner and I chased this individual to the roof of the building, where I think we both assumed he would have no place to go and give up. I know that this was what I was thinking. I never asked my partner what he was thinking at the time; so much for communication. Much to our surprise, upon reaching the roof, in an effort to continue to elude us, he began jumping from rooftop to rooftop. It was clear that he felt that we would not pursue. Again, being invincible, we followed without giving much thought to our actions at the time. I do not recall how many rooftops we jumped that day. However, we finally caught up with the subject comfortably hiding behind a wall, counting what he believed at that point was his ill-gotten gain.
We announced to the subject that we were taking him into custody and that he had to turn over the pocketbook and funds. Now at this time, my agency had not yet obtained arrest authority for its investigative staff. We approached the individual, and I handcuffed him. Now I know the thought running through your minds right now is, If you had no arrest authority, what were you doing with handcuffs? Well, again, this was early in my career, and I had not resigned from my employment as a store detective. I remained working there part-time, and I was going to that job after completing the surveillance. This being the case, I had the handcuffs with me that I used at that job.
I cuffed the subject and took custody of the pocketbook and money, and then radioed back to the office what had happened. They requested to know where we were so that they could send the police. It was then that we realized that we did not know exactly where we were. We knew that we had run several blocks and jumped rooftops of several buildings, but we had no idea where we had ended up.
At that point, we just walked the subject back to the location where he robbed the woman. The police and our fair-weather partners who had dropped out of the pursuit were there. The subject and the pocketbook were turned over to one of the officers, and we prepared to slip quietly away, like the Lone Ranger and Tonto (of course, I was the Lone Ranger). It was then that I realized that I did not have the key for the handcuffs. What can I tell you? Being invincible does not always make you prepared; that is the job of the Boy Scouts.
I share this long, somewhat humorous story to point out that there will come a time when you and your partner will have to demonstrate if you have each other’s backs. When we started that chase, it was my partner and I, along with several upstanding citizens, giving chase to the bad guy. When push came to shove, it was my partner and I standing shoulder to shoulder on an unknown rooftop, ready to face whatever came our way. Now, more than twenty-five years later, not as invincible, a few pounds heavier, a step or two slower, and blessed with a measure more of wisdom, I might handle a similar situation differently, but I would hope that I had the same partner.